Why I self publish.
Before we get started, see that? That's right, my friends, the third book of the Rise of the Hawk series has a cover and you are getting to see it. I hope you all like it! Now, on to the meat!
Ever wonder why someone chooses to self publish? I suppose most people assume that the person chose self publishing because they couldn't get an agent or they couldn't get a publishing company to work with them. Well, I'm here to tell you that isn't always true. I have never submitted my work to an agent or a publishing company. I choose to self publish for my own reasons. Why, you ask?
Well first of all, I'm a scared-y cat. The idea of taking my work and submitting it to someone to judge scares the heart out of me. I have a a hard enough time when I give a copy away for someone to give me an honest review of. You know, each time I notice a sale on Amazon, I CRINGE. What are they thinking? I ask myself. Will they like it? I bet they hate it!
Each time I get a nice review, I'm SHOCKED. I think that person must be the best person ever if they gave me a good review. When I don't get a review, I wonder what it was about my book that they didn't like enough to choose to review it. And, when I get a bad review a little part of me dies inside.
I write because I love to write. I always have these half formed books floating in my head and I want to share them. I put a lot of hard work into them, which is why I sell them rather than make them free. But, what I want more than anything is people reading the silly stories in my head.
If I tried to find an agent and I got a bunch of rejection letters, I know that I'd probably stop writing. I almost decided not to write any more Frozen Queen books because I got a bad review. Then a couple of people asked me about the sequel and I reminded myself that I can't let myself get discouraged because one person wrote a SCATHING review. See, this is why I can't go actively find an agent. I can't handle the rejection. I'll admit it, I can be very fragile, emotionally. Part of the reason I write is because it gave me an outlet to deal with my father's death. The first Frozen Queen book was written in the first months after his death. Before that book, I had written one third of a bad book and many many many, oh I am ashamed, so many poems.
So would I like to be traditionally published? Well, yes. But I don't have the courage to seek it out and have what I think is a good book rejected a hundred times. So for now, I'll self publish. And that works out for those of you who like my writing. A $2.99 ebook is a heck of a lot cheaper than what the traditionally published ones would be.
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